


Sherlock's Grownup Christmas List

by PatPrecieux



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Apologies to Clement Clarke Moore, Christmas Fluff, Inspired by Poetry, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-17
Updated: 2019-12-17
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:27:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21837463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PatPrecieux/pseuds/PatPrecieux
Summary: 'Twas the night before Christmas, and now you know the rest of the story.
Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Comments: 30
Kudos: 25





	Sherlock's Grownup Christmas List

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AlwaysJohn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlwaysJohn/gifts), [ChrisCalledMeSweetie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChrisCalledMeSweetie/gifts), [DaisyFairy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaisyFairy/gifts), [notjustmom](https://archiveofourown.org/users/notjustmom/gifts), [Podfixx](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Podfixx/gifts), [Purrfectlmt](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Purrfectlmt/gifts), [simplyclockwork](https://archiveofourown.org/users/simplyclockwork/gifts), [scrub456](https://archiveofourown.org/users/scrub456/gifts).



> Last December Purrfectlmt asked if I would ever consider a Johnlock "'Twas the night before Christmas". It's a Christmas miracle that I remembered and I hope this is a fun stocking stuffer for her and my other friends.
> 
> Again, abject apologies to the original author Clement Clarke Moore who I'm certain never envisioned his "A Visit from St.Nicholas" inspiring something like this.
> 
> *Triscuits are a wheat cracker wildly popular here in the U.S. and which are available in the U.K. FYI I am addicted to them.

'Twas the night before Christmas and in London Town  
Sherlock Holmes and John Watson were dashing around  
To catch crafty killers and arch enemies.  
They captured them all and Lestrade they did please.

Then soon they were nestled all snug in a cab  
And on the way home some Chinese they did grab.  
With one swirling Belstaff and one giggling Jawn  
Through 221's door crashed the Brain and his Brawn. 

As they stomped in the foyer they made such a clatter  
Poor Hudders ran out to see what was the matter.  
She wasn't too happy, her eyes held a flash,  
"Be glad I don't put you in bins with the trash!"

A deduction was made, "John she's angry I fear."  
"You bet I am Sherlock for Santa was here.  
I'm sorry to say that he showed me your list,  
At my time of life you should cease and desist!"

"He brought all the gifts, THAT could not have gone smoother,  
But what you Boys asked for- he needed a soother!  
As for his reindeer they ate all my biscuits,  
Now I've nothing left but hard cheese and stale Triscuits."

John gave her a hug sorry she'd been so stressed  
But as for dear Sherlock he wasn't impressed.  
"It is not his business to judge what we ask,  
We're nice, he delivers. That's his only task."

She scowled at the man that she loved like a son,  
"Then off you both go. I'm for bed, yes I'm done!"  
When the door to her flat soundly closed with a slam  
Up the stairs went the Baker Street Boys- see them scram.

"I don't understand this", John said with a sigh,  
"I only asked Santa for gloves and a tie."  
"Predictably boring", Sherlock answered back.  
"Come see what I got us, too much for one sack."

In 221B the fire was so cheery,  
But what met John's eyes made his vision quite bleary.  
The presents weren't wrapped, they were left on the floor,  
And what presents they were. John Watson...he swore!

"Bloody hell Sherlock what's this, I mean what the fuck?  
It looks like a porn shop has gone all amok!"  
"Oh yes John it's Christmas!", he shouted with glee,  
"It's porny and kinky, for you and for me!"

"There's paddles and cuffs you can't get from a shop,  
And Christmas Eve we'll start with this riding crop!"  
Nipple clamps, dildos - was Watson THAT guy?!  
Then John felt his cock pressing hard on his thigh.

He saw a long whip you might take on safari,  
And piles of red rope to be used for Shibari.  
How his blood boiled and two fists he did clench  
Until he laid eyes on a new spanking bench.

"You've been very naughty", to Sherlock he said.  
"You need to be punished. I'll turn you bright red."  
He barked out the order in best Captains voice,  
"Don't just stand there Private, you haven't a choice!"

They sprang to the bedroom, clothes flew in the air,  
And as for loud noises- they just didn't care.  
When John thrust in Sherlock so hot and so tight  
They wished all Happy Christmas and a horny goodnight.

🎄🎅🏼🎁🎄🎅🏼🎁🎄🎅🏼🎁🎄🎅🏼🎁🎄🎅🏼🎁🎄🎅🏼🎁🎄🎅🏼🎁🎄🎅🏼🎁

**Author's Note:**

> So there it is, my gift(?) to all those who mean so much to me at the Holidays and the rest of the year.
> 
> For those who celebrate Christmas- may yours be merry and bright, and to everyone else- Happy Holidays or simply Delightful December. 
> 
> I wish for each of you the joy of the season and the magical wonder of the child that still remains somewhere within all of us.  
> ❤️❤️❤️❤️ Pat


End file.
